Yo-ho, yo-ho a pirate's life for me:

Everyone wants to be a pirate, admittedly. Our collective understanding of pirate life varies yet ever since childhood I have wanted to be a real pirate. This strange desire for the outlaw lifestyle baffles many but I assure you my intentions, self serving  outlawful rather than unlawful. Spend time in Africa where anything goes and the rules don't matter. The entire continent was founded on greed and corruption, established on the fundamentals of injustice where nobody gives a shit about anyone other than themselves and the ultimate goal is pure exploitable profit. Piracy is the tax free alternative to living in country and it doesn't require me establishing a cult disguised as a religion for the tax exemption, pluses and minuses, my plan to start my own cult is another post for another time. A Google search shows modern piracy has changed much, adjusting for modernisation it's the same grim reality of plunder, pillage, drink rum, repeat of its pirate ancestry; Captain Jack Sparrow committed many evil deeds outside of overly commercialised cosplay attire in pop culture trendiness and Disney turned pure profits which kind of makes my point. However reality that unpredictable nasty thing happens beyond the confines of limited online worlds perfectly controlled for our digital distraction by artificial intelligence less intelligent than our avatars. You can't be a MMORPG pirate, digital piracy is real but who wants to stream a series about cyber piracy where the smartphone zombies steal Robux from each other. The online world is that small yellow spot floating on the surface of life's vast ocean. I openly mock you. Avast you hornswoggling yellow tea drinking sea cucumber stains, hand over your worldly possessions and I may spare your avatar death in the real world